October 2010
2 posts
August 2010
2 posts
how to sell a memoir
Please consider my memoir….I know that my family and friends will, without reservation, pay at least $19.95 to make sure they have not been unfairly exposed or defamed.
Eureka! A brilliant new marketing angle! Publishers, take note: henceforth please be certain to include these taglines on all memoir covers, “Are you sure you haven’t been slandered in this memoir? Isn’t the cost of this book a small price to pay for your peace of mind?”
you're never to old to tweet
I’d never heard of her, but thousands had. The marvelous Ivy Bean, who was 101 when an IT company helped her to get online. She quickly reached the maximum number of friends possible on Facebook, and so switched to Twitter, where she had more than 50,000 followers. She died in July, aged 104.
July 2010
8 posts
how (not) to speak with a british accent
coffeh anyone?
i write like james joyce →
iwl.me
Apparently.
the fuck this fucking shit voice: fuck this fucking shit
Hearing Voices
When a writer sits down to work, a cacophony of personalities sits down with him…
My Sister’s Voice: This is going to kill Mom.
The Ghost of Genocide Past: Your grandparents didn’t die in ovens so you can’t do this.
The Ghost of Genocide Future: One day when they’re forcing you and your children into ovens, you’ll regret having done this.
The New York Times Book Review Voice: I don’t know what this is, but I know what it isn’t; it isn’t the voice of the author’s generation, it isn’t an important new work, it isn’t a bold new voice, it isn’t the future of American fiction, and it doesn’t limn anything; I’ve read it twice now, and it doesn’t limn a fucking thing.
The Fuck This Fucking Shit Voice: Fuck this fucking shit.
more of the voices in your head from Tablet, A New Read on Jewish Life
i guess my novel won't appeal to mature men
I think my book would appeal to a great many mature adults, but especially older men. I realize that mature men do not constitute a large share of the reader’s market. Perhaps part of the reason is that they become bored with the endless trivial verbiage present in most novels.
Actually, mature men don’t mind endless trivial verbiage, as long as there are some nudey pictures thrown in every few pages.
haute stoner cuisine
“Everybody smokes dope after work,” said Anthony Bourdain, the author and chef who made his name chronicling drugs and debauchery in professional kitchens. “People you would never imagine.
So while it should not come as a surprise that some chefs get high, it’s less often noted that drug use in the kitchen can change the experience in the dining room.
In the 1980s, cocaine helped fuel the frenetic open kitchens and boisterous dining rooms that were the incubators of celebrity chef culture. Today, a small but influential band of cooks says both their chin-dripping, carbohydrate-heavy food and the accessible, feel-good mood in their dining rooms are influenced by the kind of herb that can get people arrested.”
Marijuana Fuels a New Kitchen Culture NY Times May 18, 2010
does your dad say shit like this?
“YOU, a published writer?..Internet don’t count. Any asshole can throw shit up on there.”
check it out on twitter http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays
on the web http://shitmydadsays.com/blog
Play
my next tack to wow an agent
I hope this submission leaves you in a condition of uncontrolled and irreversible “wow.”
Last time I was in that condition I spent the next day in a Mexican jail.
